How to melt away stuck, anxious feelings

Writing this article was hard.

I’m doing a self-imposed thirty articles in thirty days challenge. Being in the ‘zone’ for writing isn’t always easy. Often, I will feel stuck, bored, restless, and irritable knowing I need to do something that I don’t feel like doing.

Sound familiar?

Of course it does, you’re human. We get held back all the time for things we know we should do, or even want to do. But we get these emotions and fears and blocks that tell us ‘hell no.’

Wouldn’t it be amazing if we could handle these feelings, so that we could move freely towards what we wanted, without all that friction, and self-consciousness and baggage?

There will always be uncertainty and nerves, but we also have tools within us to help us fare more confidently and creatively in various situations.

We are emotional beings. But we can influence those emotions, just like we produced them in the first place.

Through most of my life, as a strapping lad, I thought feelings were lame. They’re just silly and meaningless. Only weaklings cared about their feelings. And this is why I’ve been blind to their value and power.

Years of self-doubt, social anxiety and unnecessary fear and avoidance eventually made me try several tools and tricks to get better.

It wasn’t until reading David R Hawkin’s book: ‘Letting Go’ that I realised the importance of noticing our feelings to heal my issues surrounding emotions.

At first, the idea seemed so trivial. Surely to make significant changes, I’d need to do drastic stuff. But this has helped and continues to help me tremendously.

The premise is simple: most of us spend our lives avoiding uncomfortable feelings. They get bottled up, and physically ‘stuck’ in our bodies. I don’t need to go into the science of this for us to know this is true.

We feel sensations in certain parts of our bodies when we bring to mind certain things.

To put it simply, to release these stuck feelings, and feel better when in certain environments or holding particular thoughts, we direct our attention towards these sensations.

By doing so, they are finally acknowledged after years of denial. In this way, they are set free.

There are other ways to overcome stuck feelings, including verbally breaking down negative beliefs. This is the intellectual approach. Here we are using an emotional and physical approach.

It sounds woo-woo because I’m terrible at explaining this kind of stuff. But do we need to know the inner workings of our nervous systems to see that we can make this work?

Do we need to be some kind of spiritual sage to make this work on ourselves?

I know I’m not.

I was able to overcome the frustration I had today, by taking a moment to notice those feelings. And then to feel them in as much intensity and detail and colour as possible.

The more razor sharp the attention placed on those sensations, the more effectively they start to fade away. When I did this, the frustration noticeably went away, replaced by refreshed enthusiasm and creativity.

When you ask yourself to rate the intensity of the feeling from 1–10 after a session, you will almost inevitably see that the number has reduced.

This does work.

Whenever I remember to do it, and I’m facing a challenge in my life, I find those feelings. I direct my awareness to them, and I sit with them. I acknowledge them. I send them love. I give them the attention they’ve been craving.

And then, like a trapped spirit in an old casket, they leave, often permanently.

The dark feeling is replaced by a warm, nourishing, light sensation that propels me forward. Sometimes I’ve laughed, or even cried.

Another example would be for when an event you don’t want to go to is approaching. Take a few minutes to sit in silence, and ask yourself:

‘What do I feel when I think about going to this place?’
‘Where do I feel it in my body?’
‘What does the sensation look like?’
‘If the feeling had a colour what would it be?’
‘If the feeling had a shape, what would that be?’
‘Where is the feeling most intense right now?’

Then hold your attention here. See and feel everything about the feeling, and go to its centre. Transmit a loving frequency towards it.

Keep doing this until the feeling starts to lose its hold, and fades away.

When you think of the event from now on, you will likely feel much more positive about it. The anxiety associated with thinking about — and going — to this event will be much less.

Next time you’re resisting something, try this process.

You could even try it with a struggling friend, family member or a client if you are a coach.

Notice the feeling. Send it attention and love. Repeat the process until it’s gone.

The only evidence you need to know this works is through feeling better at the end of it.

Wouldn’t that kind of emotional release create massive change in so many areas of your life?

It can.

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If you have 10.98 seconds, I’d love to hear what you think. Just a few words below. I appreciate them all.

What makes you come alive?